But that’s just it. If she wanted privacy, would she be nursing in public? Why is a baby feeding, something to hide in private anyway? It’s just a baby sucking on a boob. All mammals do it. We should all get over any negative social mores about a boob being partially exposed to feed a baby.
I already answered your second question, twice over.
I think a lot of this is because of the prudishness of Americans. I remember a superbowl halftime show a few years ago where people were complaining that the woman was “half naked” because she showed some cleavage. If I remember, her neck line went down to her belly button. Yet nobody would bat an eye if it was a completely topless guy. I once saw a creepy old guy wearing nothing but a speedo walking through a public park. Creepy as hell, but not illegal. It’s such a double standard that exists because we made boobies naughty, which at least had a hand in sexualizing women in this country. The public schools to this day have a long list of things “people” can’t wear in school, almost all of it girl’s clothing. And across the country such rules tend to be enforced only for the girls with attractive figures. Girl’s can’t wear spaghetti straps because seeing a girl’s shoulder might be “too distracting” for a boy. Yet boys play basketball as shirts and skins, showing their entire torsos.
In America, yes, it would probably be a little creepy to talk to a breast feeding mom, not because it’s a special moment between woman and child (trust me, that feeling wears off in a couple of weeks), but because we have sexualized women’s breasts so that, in our heads, if a man approaches a woman breast feeding to comment on her baby, something she would usually love, we’re wondering if he’s looking at her tits and it creeps us out. Yes, it is creepy, but let’s not pretend its for any noble reason. It’s simply because we assume the guy is a perve because her boobies are out in that moment and boobies are naughty.
Of all coating industries, the female cosmetic industry is the largest. I wonder why. Becoming “sexually attractive”, perhaps?
We have certain expectations of women we don’t have of men. They are judged more by their appearance and outfit. A woman who has had sex with 3+ men is a “slut” while a man who has had sex with a dozen or more women is a “stud”. If the show a small portion of the area men freely show without thought they are sexualized or chastised for it. I imagine it’s quite difficult being a woman in this country, though it’s much worse in most Muslim majority countries. Hell, anywhere in the world, really, it’s probably much harder to be a woman than a man. But, of course, with that comes some benefits as well. Women rule us men secretly. Everything we do, especially in our youth, is to attract or impress them. An attractive young lady can get men to do anything she wants, even if they know they’re never, ever going to touch her, just because our manly brains say, “Yeah, but there’s a chance.”, even when we know there’s not. But I don’t think that makes up for periods, sexism, judgement, all the work of makeup, hair and outfit every day, lower pay, less respect, etc.
You should look up “not tolerating the intoletable”. Its a critical factor for civil society."Intolerable" varies a lot. It's impossible to stay on top of it but some feel compelled to try, even though they always lose.
Is it really that hard to not fly into a rage when I see or think about people living their lives in a way I would not enjoy myself? A “live and let live” attitude is actually a whole lot more chill than a “You’re going to burn in Hell!” way of looking at things. There is no cross to bear. I actually got down off the cross when I accepted that there were people in the world who were different than me and that was okay.Maybe Lausten's group could use this advice.
Maybe Lausten’s group could use this advice.We already know this. The workshops are designed for people who are ready to sit in a room for a few hours with people they disagree with and listen to the very things they disagree about.
“Intolerable” varies a lot.This is not about post-modern morality. Start with not poking me in the eye with a sharp stick but keeping in mind that self-defense is necessary for a civil society. Build from there.
Albert Brooks is conservative columnist and writer. I’m reading his book “Love Your Enemies”. I got to the part about the “dignity gap” this morning. This is the older white male middle class that is feeling left out of the new economy. They are the only group that who’s mortality rate has increased recently, due to cirrhosis of the liver and opiate overdoses mostly. I get it. What I don’t get is why they thought the Affordable Care Act was not made with them in mind.
I went looking for a video or article to post, and found this comment. It’s disconnected from anything, but it’s directly responding to this section of the book. It’s my feelings exactly.
I was astounded by Brooks’s incomplete appreciation of history in this segment. Brooks made no reference to America’s failure to afford dignity to Native Americans while stealing their lands. No mention of the dignity America stole from African-Americans by enslaving them and then oppressing them with Jim Crow laws and various forms of overt and covert discrimination. There is nothing new about this “dignity gap.” Brooks talks about asking ourselves what it means to needing another person in America. He says that the answer *now* is that there are people we have decided we don’t need in the workforce. I daresay after slavery ended and as Native Americans were forced into reservations, America long ago declared it did not need or want whole populations of people. I think it is telling that Brooks has become concerned with “unneeded people” just in the context of the recent economic malaise that has afflicted the rust belt and similar areas.
If T rump steals the next election, I will be concerned with the possibility of what remains of the Native American populations being further betrayed, crushed and exploited. This would be consistent with the T rump agenda and consistent with his disgusting character.
I like it. And like a fine wine, it’s worth letting it breath a little:
Unlimited tolerance must lead to the disappearance of tolerance.If we extend unlimited tolerance even to those who are intolerant, if we are not prepared to defend a tolerant society against the onslaught of the intolerant, then the tolerant will be destroyed, and tolerance with them. —
In this formulation, I do not imply, for instance, that we should always suppress the utterance of intolerant philosophies; as long as we can counter them by rational argument and keep them in check by public opinion, suppression would certainly be unwise.
But we should claim the right to suppress them if necessary even by force; for it may easily turn out that they are not prepared to meet us on the level of rational argument, but begin by denouncing all argument; they may forbid their followers to listen to rational argument, because it is deceptive, and teach them to answer arguments by the use of their fists or pistols.
We should therefore claim, in the name of tolerance, the right not to tolerate the intolerant.
Thank Karl and π.
Love the cartoon too, though it could be made more interesting with a Through-The-Looking-Glass view of what that fat dude in the middle is seeing within his addled mind.
Don’t Tolerate Intolerance
That should make a decent bumper sticker.
On a personal note, we had 54 people in an auditorium last night talking about how to restore civil citizenship despite our leaders lack of leadership. Not bad for a city up in the frozen north. The conservatives were about 15% of that, but a couple are showing interest in organizing, so I hope that participation will increase.
TimB: “If T rump steals the next election, I will be concerned with the possibility of what remains of the Native American populations being further betrayed, crushed and exploited.”
Short answer: Three generations ago, and before, there was war, your ancestors lost, the European invaders won. Get over it.
Unpacked: Don’t blame me for your troubles today, I wasn’t there then, neither were you. All I owe you is the same thing you owe me, an equal opportunity. Don’t ask me to give you an unfair advantage today because your ancestors, or you, wanted to hang on to a defeated culture. Assimilate or suffer the inevitable poverty.
TimB, are you aware of how much of my tax money the government spends supporting Native Americans with programs like the IHS or how many advantages we give them like taxes and casino permits which are not provided for non-Native Americans? A really big part of the problems Native Americans have today is the result of the tribal socialism they are trapped in. They have little reason to get education and work as long as everything is provided for them. Without personal achievement dignity is absent. They will remain wards of the state unless they leave the reservation and join the rest of society.
@Bob The thing is, the European invaders’ ancestors are still doing it. It’s been perpetuated through the generations and really needs to stop. The dotard should not be taking their land for oil when we have wind, water, and solar for power. BTW, it was more than 3 generations ago the stealing of Native land and genocide of Native Americans began. Their tribal socialism worked a heck of a lot better for them than the White man’s government has. Up until the 1970s Native women were “sterilized” after having one child so that they could not have anymore and when their children became school they were taken and put in Carlisle school and abuse for speaking their native tongue. The list of abuse were horrifying and destroyed a whole generation. Today, Native American women and girls are kidnapped, raped, and murdered at a far higher rate than white women. The abuses by European ancestors continue today. One last thing, what you are demanding of Native Americans is to give up their culture, which is psychologically damaging, and take up the ways of the White Man. When you say “join the rest of society” you are saying they have to conform to White man’s society and give up their own culture. That is very damaging and a big reason there is a lot of alcoholism and mental illness among Natives.
All I owe you is the same thing you owe me, an equal opportunity.But it's not equal. I have way more opportunity than a kid born on a reservation out in the middle of nowhere in North Dakota. I owe you and everybody on this planet a share of what was handed to me on a silver platter. If I don't, then we are back to being brutish animals who grab food from each other and show our teeth and growl. If my parents and extended family didn't feel they owed something to the world, I would be uneducated and probably just angry at anyone who had more than me.
Can’t you even just imagine how you would see it if your town was burned to the ground by a foreign invader, killing your family while you were away on business? Would you come back and say, well, that’s over, nothing I can do about now. We’re all equal again.
Mriana: “When you say “join the rest of society” you are saying they have to conform to White man’s society and give up their own culture. That is very damaging and a big reason there is a lot of alcoholism and mental illness among Natives.”
Their culture today is the same as my culture; the notion that there are separate cultures is false. I am part of theirs, they are part of mine, we are part of each other’s. Separate histories yes, but not separate todays.
The main reason for their problems is a lack of incentives to join society. Reservation life is a classic example of how socialism eliminates incentives and ultimately destroys the dignity achieved by earning what one needs. We saw the same things in the “projects” of the '60s and we see it in our welfare system today. Alcoholism, drug abuse and mental illness are symptoms of an individual having no purpose in his/her life.
I have friends who have escaped the humiliation of reservations and public housing. I’ve had them in my home and I’ve been in theirs; they are great people. It can be done, but one has to want it. The only way we can help someone to want it is to show them that life can be better on the outside. There must be incentives to leave that life and join the rest of society.
Lausten: “I owe you and everybody on this planet a share of what was handed to me on a silver platter.”
This is standard communist BS morality. When Cain asked God “Am I my brother’s keeper?” how did God answer?
He said “I know what you did.” He did not say yes.
No, I am not my brother’s keeper. We cannot share wealth, we can only share poverty. I do not feel compelled to throw away what my father and mother gave me because your father and mother didn’t give the same to you. You would do well to not covet what I have and to not use the power of government to rob me of it. Let those who do not have earn what they want. Life is not fair, it never was, it never will be. We can be fair to one another by giving each an equal opportunity. Will I give you a hand up if I can? Always, but not if you try to force me to do it. Grace is not grace when it is mandated.
Their culture today is the same as my culture; the notion that there are separate cultures is false. I am part of theirs, they are part of mine, we are part of each other’s. Separate histories yes, but not separate todays.
You do not understand. There is a cultural identity for everyone. Maybe you’ve lost yours, but the point is Latinos have a cultural identity, Native Americans have one, African Americans have it too, etc etc. To demand they give up their cultural identity is to insist they become more like you and that causes problems. Some of these things are natural hair for African Americans, which is very beautiful, some of it is like powwows.com The list goes on and on. No on is asking them to stay on the Rez. That’s their choice if they do, but my point is, their identity is not yours.
I have friends who have escaped the humiliation of reservations and public housing.
That’s great. No one’s saying they need to stay on the Rez or in public housing. The issue is identity. There are incentives for them to leave the Rez, like grants for a college education. People often get an education- a degree in medicine, law, psychology, sociology and then go back to the Rez to help those who need it. When I got my degree in Psychology, I also studied Sociology, Native American Studies, and African American Studies. I also had college courses with both and attended activities with them and cultural identity is very important. To “beat the Native American out of them” is wrong. That’s what Carlisle Schools did and it was very damaging. What you want is to force them to be like you and that is wrong and very damaging. Because of Carlisle Schools, my grandmother on my father’s side was very afraid to even teach us her language, and my father often said, “in the home we can talk about our Native ancestry, but outside the home we are white”. I feel as though I’ve been deprived of that side of my ancestry and for someone to demand I or my sons who are 1/2 black to conform, is to demand that we act 100% white. No one should tell my sons or my grandson they need to hide their black hair, cut it short, straighten it, or what have you. That is wrong! My older son who’s 30 is proud of his hair, so much so he has worn it long and “poofy” since high school and for a while, my young son had a fro and I loved it. I’ve attended a sweat lodge and other Native events and you have no idea what it feels like to participate in such things. What do white people have by way of culture? Nothing, IMHO. They just go about life participating in and feeding corporate greed. That is the white man’s way of life and many have lost the feeling of what it’s like to be close to nature, often trying to tame it or even destroying it. Want to help save the environment? Stop drilling on Native land and stop the dotard’s damn wall that harms wildlife and destroys Native American burial grounds. Would you want someone desecrating your ancestors’ graves? I don’t think so and life isn’t necessarily better just because you believe it is. Your so down because you think you know the truth and all, take a look around you- climate change destroying life on earth, including human life, for one. If that’s better than living close to nature, better than being a Water Protector, better than protecting endangered wildlife, and better than fighting climate change, then you and I have a difference of opinion of what is better. I do not want to be part of a society, though I live it, that feeds corporate greed, kills other animals, and destroys the environment. What you are saying is very much anti-minorities and your friends, you say you have, who left the Rez for “a better life and join society” have given up and even forgotten their culture. What you see as humiliation (housing and the Rez) is not Native American culture. That is the remains of the White man forcing them to conform to the White man’s (European) ways. You do not know what Native American culture or even Black culture is. You look from the outside and see suffering and oppression and think, “Gee, if they just join the rest of society”- “the White Man’s ways”. You have no clue. You may have been in your friends’ homes, but you didn’t see culture. You only saw yourself and you were so proud they became like you.
The Sioux have a word for the state of mind you want everyone to have, Xian, and that word is wasichu. It means a greedy person and in modern days also used to describe greedy corporations and government who steal the land and resources of Native Americans for profit- such a oil. But I would also call the dotard a wasichu too.
Wasi'chu does not describe a race; it describes a state of mind.Wasi’chu is also a human condition based on inhumanity, racism, and exploitation. It is a sickness, a seemingly incurable and contagious disease which begot the ever advancing society of the West. If we do not control it, this disease will surely be the basis for what may be the last of the continuing wars against the Native American people.