Bang Bang Test

Politics and Social Issues
1

All too true. Something for everyone to laugh at and squirm over.
Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?
Here is a little test that will help you decide.
The answer can be found by posing the following question:
You’re walking down a
Deserted street with your wife
And two small children.
Suddenly, a Terrorist with a huge knife
Comes around the corner,
Locks eyes with you,
Screams obscenities,
Raises the knife, and charges at you…
You are carrying a
Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot.
You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?
THINK CAREFULLY AND
THEN SCROLL DOWN:
Democrat’s Answer:

  • Well, that’s not enough information to answer the question!* What is a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP?* Does the man look poor or oppressed?* Is he really a terrorist? Am I guilty of profiling?* Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?Could we run away? What does my wife think?* What about the kids?* Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?* What does the law say about this situation?* Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?* Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?* Is it possible he’d be happy with just killing me?* Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?* If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?* Should I call 9-1-1?* Why is this street so deserted?* We need to raise taxes, have paint & weed day.* Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.* I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.* This is all so confusing!
    … … … … … … … … .
    Republican’s Answer:
    BANG!
    … … … … … … … …
    Southerner’s Answer:
    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    BANG ! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    Click… (Sounds of reloading)
    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!BANG!BANG!
    Click
    Daughter: ‘Nice grouping, Daddy!’
    'Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?!
    Son: ‘Can I shoot the next one?!’
    Wife: 'You ain’t taking that to the Taxidermist
2

Bertrand Russell summed it up more concisely a long time ago:
“The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts.”

3
Bertrand Russell summed it up more concisely a long time ago: "The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts."
Indeed. That's so true. LL
4

I am a Southerner, but not a Repugnatican. I would only fire three shots. If I were overly certain of my expert marksmanship, I would only fire once.

5
Bertrand Russell summed it up more concisely a long time ago: "The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts."
I'll drink to that. :coolsmirk:
6
Bertrand Russell summed it up more concisely a long time ago: "The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts."
I have aspired to be wise, most of my life. But in the scenario presented, aspiring most, to be wise, at the moment that family member's lives are in jeopardy, seems rather foolish, to me.
7

Funny because its true.
“Frailty, thy name is democrat”

8
Funny because its true. "Frailty, thy name is democrat"
Actually, it is because of my relative "frailty" that I would consider myself obliged to kill the "terrorist". If I were a Steven Segall type, I could just disarm him, and maybe break a couple of his bones.
9
Funny because its true. “Frailty, thy name is democrat"
True, because no Democrat would slap on his white hat, throw on a flight suit and head for Iraq ta kill him some turrerists while his trusty side kick stays home and shoots his huntin' buddy in the face. An that by god is th Lord's truth! Cap't Jack