Overall a rather pessimistic view since it seems to equate being yourself with being a loner while love is something that requires a mask in order to receive and I’m just not sure it’s that simple.
No, we didn’t trade authenticity for love. Maybe this guy did, but he’s saying everyone had a life like him. Hell, not everyone went to school and had mild discipline that included shaming. Pop psychology is not all wrong, but it doesn’t give you tools for sorting out the details of your experience.
Yeah, people sometimes feel alone when they’re with others. But some people enjoy their alone time. These things aren’t wrong in an objective sense. I kept finding logic problems and over generalizations in this video. He might be sincere, but he’s not good at this. His best advice is to look into the work of Gabor Mate. (Note he uses a full mind-body approach).
Reconnecting with the authentic self is not something that can be covered in a half hour video
I’m not even sure if this is pop psychology. The but at the 31:00 mark is about some void when you stop performing and realizing there is no you.
There’s also a bit about trusting your gut instincts but gut instincts are only right about 50% of the time. And if you have an anxiety disorder (like me) it’s even less trustworthy.
That’s the kind of thing that I’m saying isn’t a tool that you can take away from this short talk. It’s not wrong, learning when to trust your “fast” thinking and when to slow down and think a problem through is a skill you can develop, but, this guy doesn’t give you much to go on. At best, he’s giving you a starting point.
What he doesn’t talk about is developing a rich environment of inputs and feedback where you can check your progress. This begins with being curious, asking questions instead of thinking there is “the answer” out there somewhere.
This feeling he’s describing comes after you’ve been inauthentic with people, trying to please them instead of expressing your truth, your desires, and your preferences. So, don’t do that. I know it’s not that easy, because we do want to get along and be agreeable. That’s fine, go to the movie that someone else picked, but notice if you are constantly doing what others want. Express yourself, and if they say they never like your ideas, at some point you have to think about them not being a match for you. And that doesn’t have to be a dramatic breakup, you can do some things with them, but not everything.
There is a “you”, and it’s up to you to express yourself.
It sounded different to me but I guess on second listen it does sound like that.
I’ve seen other videos by him and honestly a lot of them sound like projection on his part. Like in this one the Gabor Mate mention is wrong, Mate’s theory about the good dying young ended up having no scientific support for it.