I always ask the question, what does a term like “theory of mind” mean in terms of actual behavior.
I look at the concept of “mind” for example, as the composite of all the various thinking behaviors that we are aware of in ourselves. And a big part of thinking behaviors involve verbal behaviors. e.g. I am using covert verbal behavior, right now, to help me compose this post.
Now, the term “theory of mind” refers to our behaviors of recognizing that “I” and “you” and others as separate individuals who have their own thoughts, feelings, etc.
I think that our complex verbal behaviors, to some extent are scaffolding for the development of the behaviors involved in theory of mind.
Our complex verbal behaviors develop by virtue of our evolution as social animals, cared for throughout an early developmental period of being cared for and responded to by caregivers. Our verbal behaviors develop functionally, i.e., our verbal behaviors develop by virtue of the responses we get from listeners.
Anyway, the point, I want to get to, is that our verbal behavior including that which is thoughts, is a product of reinforcement by listeners, but it can sometimes ALSO be a product of (or is affected by) occurring emotions. This is where, I think, the psychological defenses, that Freud came up with, impact on the defense mechanism behaviors.
And the reason it is useful to examine all of these things in terms of behaviors, is that we can analyze behaviors in terms of the rules of behavior that we know. I think that this is the most coherent avenue for addressing and understanding the development of what we tend to refer to as psychological processes.