Donald "Babyhands" Trump Jokes

Please feel free to add your own Trump’s-hands-so-tiny jokes, e.g.,
Donald Trump’s hands are SO TINY, that…
his fingers are even shorter than his attention span.

Donald Trump's hands are SO TINY, that... when he makes fun of someone with arthritic hand deformities, it can only be detected by the Hubble Telscope. Donald Trump's hands are SO TINY, that... when he asked for his wives' hands in marriage, they each had to offer him the hand of a Classic Barbie. Donald Trump's hands are SO TINY, that... when he brushes his teeth, it's one tooth at a time. Donald Trump's hands are SO TINY, that... he has to hire foreign cosmetologists (from Lilliputia) when he needs a manicure. Donald Trump's hands are SO TINY, that... when paramecium see them coming, they're like "Oh no. There goes the neighborhood."

Was it intuition, I saw this coming…

Donald Trump defends size of his penis By Gregory Krieg http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/history-donald-trump-small-hands-insult/story?id=37395515
no pun intended

then again

I know we’ve had some real dicks as president - but has dick size ever been an issue in a previous presidential election?

http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/history-donald-trump-small-hands-insult/story?id=37395515
Marco Rubio told supporters last week that GOP presidential rival Donald Trump is "always calling me 'little Marco.'" "He is taller than me, he's like 6' 2", which is why I don't understand why his hands are the size of someone who is 5' 2"," Rubio joked. "Have you seen his hands? And you know what they say about men with small hands -- " The crowd erupted. " -- You can't trust them," Rubio said.
Rubio’s comment may come across tasteless for a presidential hopeful, but that was not the first time someone has questioned the size of Trump’s hands.
more links, but I'll spare you folks Trump Responds to Rubio's Crude Remark With One of His Own Marco Rubio Mocks Donald Trump's Spray Tan, Small Hands Republican Presidential Debate: 5 Moments That Mattered
Nearly 30 years ago, Graydon Carter, the editor of Vanity Fair magazine, described Trump in Spy magazine as a “short-fingered vulgarian." In an editor’s letter in "Vanity Fair" last November, Carter said that he wrote the Sky magazine comment in 1988 "just to drive him a little bit crazy." And according to Carter, it still does. "Like so many bullies, Trump has skin of gossamer," Carter wrote in November. "To this day, I receive the occasional envelope from Trump. There is always a photo of him—generally a tear sheet from a magazine. On all of them he has circled his hand in gold Sharpie in a valiant effort to highlight the length of his fingers," Carter wrote. "I almost feel sorry for the poor fellow because, to me, the fingers still look abnormally stubby."
Tim, sorry I hope I haven't derailed your thread. :) :snake:

Paula shows me the coolest videos. Rather than starting a new thread, guess I’ll highjack this one.
no hard feelings Tim

Published on Mar 4, 2016 Ready for the latest beauty trend? This trick will make your face great again! #Trumping https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xDgy37kPOZ4 %-P
Was it intuition, I saw this coming…
Donald Trump defends size of his penis By Gregory Krieg http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/history-donald-trump-small-hands-insult/story?id=37395515
no pun intended
I wouldn't normally stoop to dick jokes, but if you insist: Donald Trump's hands are SO TINY, that... he has no difficulty masturbating.
Paula shows me the coolest videos. Rather than starting a new thread, guess I'll highjack this one. no hard feelings Tim
Published on Mar 4, 2016 Ready for the latest beauty trend? This trick will make your face great again! #Trumping https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xDgy37kPOZ4 %-P
Now, she is funny! But in attempt to keep this important thread intact: Donald Trump’s hands are SO TINY, that… it is hoped thru the use of the Hadron Supercollider to, one day, prove the existence of his fingers.
I know we've had some real dicks as president - but has dick size ever been an issue in a previous presidential election?
I don't know about dick size, per se, as an issue in Presidential politics, but the tactic of identifying and amplifying a perceived weakness of an opponent, has precedent. In the election of 1800, Thomas Jefferson said of his opponent, President Adams, that he has a "hideous hermaphroditical character, which has neither the force and firmness of a man, nor the gentleness and sensibility of a woman." (Alas, the good ol' days, when even personal slams were delivered with some sense of elegant eloquence.)
I know we've had some real dicks as president - but has dick size ever been an issue in a previous presidential election?
I don't know about dick size, per se, as an issue in Presidential politics, but the tactic of identifying and amplifying a perceived weakness of an opponent, has precedent. In the election of 1800, Thomas Jefferson said of his opponent, President Adams, that he has a "hideous hermaphroditical character, which has neither the force and firmness of a man, nor the gentleness and sensibility of a woman." (Alas, the good ol' days, when even personal slams were delivered with some sense of elegant eloquence.)It's particularly poignant, considering that Jefferson was probably John's best friend. It wasn't that bad though, John did have a wife who loved him dearly, what more can we hope for. :cheese:
Paula shows me the coolest videos. Rather than starting a new thread, guess I'll highjack this one. no hard feelings Tim
Published on Mar 4, 2016 Ready for the latest beauty trend? This trick will make your face great again! #Trumping https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xDgy37kPOZ4 %-P
Great. She should have added a wig, though. Lois

Everyone seems to think Rubio was referring to the family jewels. i think he was referring to brain size. Trump said he has “no trouble in that department”–I beg to differ. That’s where all the trouble is and Trump proves it every time he opens his little trumpet mouth.

Donald Trump’s hands are SO TINY, that…
Quarks are like “Hey! Outta the way, pipsqueaks!”

Donald Trump’s hands are SO TINY, that…
it is strongly suspected that there was an Oompa Loompa, in a woodshed, somewhere in his ancestral family tree.

Paula shows me the coolest videos. Rather than starting a new thread, guess I'll highjack this one. no hard feelings Tim
Published on Mar 4, 2016 Ready for the latest beauty trend? This trick will make your face great again! #Trumping https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xDgy37kPOZ4 %-P
Great. She should have added a wig, though. Lois Or even, better, she could have attached a hamster, to the top front part of her hair.

Donald Trump’s hands are SO TINY, that…
if they were poker hands, each would be a 2,3,4,5,7 of varying suits.

Paula shows me the coolest videos. Rather than starting a new thread, guess I'll highjack this one. no hard feelings Tim
Published on Mar 4, 2016 Ready for the latest beauty trend? This trick will make your face great again! #Trumping https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xDgy37kPOZ4 %-P
Great. She should have added a wig, though. Lois Or even, better, she could have attached a hamster, to the top front part of her hair. Yes, even better. Lois

Donald Trump’s hands are SO TINY that…
they are almost as small as his integrity.

Donald Trump’s hands are SO TINY that…
they are almost as small as the “mindedness” of his racist and tribal supporters.

Donald Trump’s hands are so tiny that. . .
They are tooi insignificant to discuss.